Lisa lampanelli pussy

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Lisa Lampanelli has long been regarded as a queen. She has opened up to Out In Jersey in what is arguably her most interpersonal conversation yet. From working with President Trump, committing to celibacy, her covert education, life-altering struggles and upcoming New Jersey appearances. Will Loschiavo: Of all the venues you typically perform at in the Garden State, which one do you prefer most? Or I can actually not lie and say any place the big dirty homosexuals come out to see me! LL: Well you know I am the only true insult comic left since my hero, Don Rickles, passed away last year.

Yes, this is a very big honor. I consider it a badge of honor. Speaking of queens, you are also the Queen of Roasts, having participated in countless Comedy Central celebrity roasts over the years. Which do you feel was your absolute best performance? LL: This is tough. I really loved the Flavor Flav roast. There was so much diversity, and it was definitely way more diverse than any other roast.

They had the most material that was available to us. There was so much to poke fun at between those guys. I think when you are given a subject who is so crazy and has so many things wrong with them, the roast is going to be perfect. On that note, you roasted Donald Trump twice. You even starred in Celebrity Apprentice making it to the final four. Having gotten to know Trump personally, what was your experience like working with him?

Is the man you know the same man in the White House today? LL: I guarantee you we are all kind of who we were. I think Trump was always who he is today. The thing is, he never had the opportunity to showcase it to the degree he has now. LL: Yes! This is what kills me.

He was always a gentleman to me. After the roasts he would hug us thereafter, give us kudos, etc. In the show I do in Jersey I am going to perform a really good Trump piece. There is no arguing that this is a cluster fuck of a presidency. As long as this may be for just a few more months, I believe we will survive. Are you heavily involved with the organization? What other charities do you work with? LL: Absolutely! I look out for my boys. They strike I strike harder.

I support three-legged-homos and two-legged-one-eyed dogs. Do you feel like the three-legged-homos identify with you and vice-versa because they connect with you as an underdog? LL: Yaaas! That is what I have always believed at least. I do feel I am kind of this corky looking older woman who was of a certain weight before she became a certain age.

And now even though I am the most beautiful woman on the planet because of my weight loss surgery, hey, the homos still know I am on the outside just like them. So, I think we are all on the outside together! There is also an element of misperception the community seems to correlate with. You get heat for being crude and labeled unintelligent, yet it is not widely known that you completed your bachelors at Syracuse University and various programs at Ivy League universities.

Does this disappoint you, or do you enjoy using your education as a weapon? LL: I am always smart enough to get into these Ivy League schools for the summer and it all stops there laughs. I completed three different summer programs: one at Yale University, one at Harvard University, and one at Columbia University. I will go to all of the Ivy League schools… just for six weeks alone.

It was right around the time I was starting to raise money for my play. I learned an abundance about acting which truly shaped me. It stuck. It is one of the hardest professions to do properly. Right now I am obsessed with The Walking Dead. I actually just watched an episode prior to this interview and its ironic how good all of the actors are compared to this one woman who clearly was not up to par.

What I loved about attending the Ivy League programs is that its mostly young people! I loved thinking I was 25 again. I actually worked myself out of the junk food of men to a very decent ex-husband. And now I am going on five years celibate! All I need is another urinary tract infection to beat this pussy up again. LL: I have had it rough in the love department. Thus, I finally promised myself I am not going to date again until I really meet an equal. I love the idea of someday dating again but it is just not a priority for me right now.

It is the last thing I think about today having been a serial dater for so long. I have come to really enjoy my own company. We live in an interesting society. In one-way people, especially those in the public eye, are torn apart brutally on social media. Yet, on the other hand, everyone seems to be hyper sensitive and offended by anything and everything. Do you feel people today look to, or like to, be offended? LL: I think people love making themselves angry with something they or someone else feels victimized about. For instance, when I started doing insult comedy I never had any ethnic groups getting mad at me.

But I had white people getting mad at me for making black jokes. So fuck you white devil, that is none of your business. Listen, I never have a problem with people getting mad at me or asking for apologies one-on-one. I use it as a promotional tool.

If you want jokes out of me then pay for tickets. I am not wasting jokes on losers in characters. Lick me! You always seem to stand your ground whether what you say causes an uproar or not. Do you feel, in the case of Kathy Griffin, that the backlash she received was warranted, and moreover, that the public apology she issued hurt her more than helped her? LL: Unfortunately, I think that was not as well thought out as it should have been. I feel bad for her because I think it was just something that went awry. We all make mistakes yet to apologize, then say you are not apologizing, then act victimized over it, is a really bad look.

I think she can definitely have a hell of a comeback, and best-selling book with that. It is disappointing people overreact to comedy. I believe in her. She just needs to shift her mindset, let it go, focus on the positive. We all are really lucky. There is no one more fortunate than me who gets to go on stage, call people names, and get a check the same night.

As much as you are an insult comic, you are also self-deprecating, poking fun at your appearance, and being honest about your gastric-sleeve surgery. In a world that has put so much emphasis on appearance, do you find that comedians destigmatize this cultural push for perfection?

LL: Look at all the comedians. Any time I had a physical flaw I made fun of it. Listen, if you were gorgeous, you would be in the movies. LL: Clearly, there is one reason for my success… genius! The other thing is warmth. I think warmth is a big deal; just letting people know from your attitude that you are one of them. You had mentioned in the past you tried a plethora of diets, even going to food rehab before your surgery.

Any specific advice you have for those struggling with their weight? Food rehab was the worst. I was amongst all anorexics, bulimics, and a few overeaters. I was still the fat chick! You need to find out what is triggering your downfall. With me, I had dependency issues. And since [then], I never dated a bad boy. It is an inside job. We get fat because we are using food as medication for a void we are trying to fill.

I focus on why I ate, not what I ate. I am constantly asking myself if I am hungry for food or if I am lonely, tired, etc. This is a lot of work but it is not worth dying young over. I want to live another 50 years. The only way that is happening is if I keep this weight off because it is a big deterrent to lifelong health. LL: Nothing strikes you as funny in the moment because you are fighting for your life as well as not to kill yourself with food or dating bad men. Trump did try to grab me by the pussy, however, my cock and balls got in the way laughs.

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